Saturday, 1 July 2017

Research Trip to Chester Cathedral

St Aldhelm! LIterally my favourite riddling Saint. Just looking at him you half suspect this motherfucker knows what a d20 is.

"More cunning than all creatures gulping air,
I scatter seeds of death through every field
So toxic crops produce a horrid yield,
Which the Old Goat's grim sickle reaps for sin.
My fights with antlered bucks make me beware,
And, when old, I will shed my ancient skin
And, spurred by newfound youth, again begin."

(Riddles courtesy of A.M. Justers translation.)

Uriel, here as a saint rather than an archangel, even though he's pretty high ranked? There is actually another, more goth Uriel in the main part which I couldn't get close enough to get a picture of. 

Another Aldhelm riddle..

"We are not spawned by Saturn's blighted son,
Jove, called in bardic verse "The Mighty One,"
And Delian Latona's not our mother.
I'm not called "Cynthia," nor Phoebus "brother";
The Lord who fashioned high Olympus reigns
Instead now from His heavenly domains.
We split the four-part world as we agreed:
Days pass and nights progress as we decreed.
If siblings won't rule passing time by right.
Alas, vast chaos would eclipse the light
And then in Hell dark Erebus would lead."

Here's Micheal, with a sword, looking like a badass. And...

He brought fresh souls! Enough for everyone.

Here's Hugh Lupus, looks a bit different to his Wikipedia description; "Hugh, due to his gluttony, became so fat that he could hardly walk, earning him the nickname of le Gros (the Fat). He would also earn the nickname Lupus (Wolf) for his savage ferocity against the Welsh."

Another Hugh, but blonder and this time being nice to a priest who I think is from St Bees, near where I grew up.

Here's another closeup with SlimHugh next to Earl Leofric. Lady Godiva's husband. It's nice these two are getting in in the window since if they ever met they would have Fucked. Each. Other. UP.

And apparently Scrap Princess broke into the Cathedral at some point.

"When bloody flooding killed the human race
And brand-new seas put mortals in their place
(Except for those who carried mankind's seed),
First among beasts, I snubbed what law decreed,
Deriding yielding to the Lord's command,
For which. I think, a poet would declare,
"The sin revealed on surf was cleansed on land."
Now I won't fill my brood with banquet fare
Until I see plumes blacken on their skin.
Remove a letter, I will lack my kin."

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