Sunday 11 August 2019

We Played Inquisitor - Game One: Hunt the Fat Priest


Beyond or within the Great Rift the forgotten Riweal Nebulae, fifth planet of the Spen system, its star a young main-sequence star occluded by unknown cosmic debris (Evans fancy lamp), in a dark abandoned corner of that worlds spaceport.

Some time in either the late 41st or early 42nd millennium, (adjusted for the vagaries of warp travel),

(Actually at on Evans extendable dining room table at his place in Toronto over the afternoon and evening of August the 9th 2019).

Also, thanks to Ram for taking notes and to everyone for providing pictures.


Three groups of mysterious wierdos gather,

(In reality Ramanan SinvaranjanEvan Webber, Brendan S and myself, with assistance from K Yani)

Who are they?

Inquistor Maximus Delbrück, an Inquisitor of the Ordo Biologis, and his retinue;

Ramanan Sivaranjan’s retinue of Inquisitor Delbrück
  •  Inquistor Maximus Delbrück, Arch-Sequencior of the Ordo Biologus
  •  Onthu Prime, Seconded from the the Skitarii Dravidian
  •  Keira Knifely, Assassin
  •  Dione, Ex-Military
  •  Johan Pistolson, Assassin
  •  Herc 19-80,  Seconded from the the Skitarii Dravidian

From an arguably more-radical splinter of the Ordo Biologis comes Inquisitor Du Miir, allied with the forces of Navigator House Shen and their bonded troops of the Salmagundi Iuvenis Five-Five regiment.

Evans beautifully converted Investigatorii of House Shen 
  •  Inquisitor Du Miir, Statisticodicier of the Ordo Biologus + Gunthrall
  •  Tach, Seneschal of the Salmagundi Iuvenis Five-Five regiment, ex-guardsman   
  •  Bannerman Summa, also of the Salmagundi Iuvenis Five-Five (honorary) 
  •  Al’Pharem 503, Anthrodact Chirurgeon
  •  Protomott 404, Anthrodact Coffin-bearer

(Delbrück and House Shen either have (or will) encounter(d) each other before, or to be. The Rift itself having splintered the relevant chronology and scattered their mutually interacting causality paths.)  (Ram and Evan have played with these characters before and have yet to decide where these events are in their personal continuity.)

Added to this are a pack of outcast mutants claiming (ludicrously) to be time-travellers from the 51st millennia, where they are the final remaining Space Marines, who worship a psychic moon on the galactic rim which reflects the last light of the (long vanished) Astronomicon.

Patrick Stuart’s Cult of the Imprisoned Moon.

  •  Apothecary Krax
  •  Flailmeister
  •  The Great Primaris
  •  Chapter Master
  •  Codicier Horn
  •  Blind Arcturus


Via garbled multiply-transmitted Astropathic messages and refugee-born rumours, stories have reached the Imperium of the emergence of Frater Gorgos, a radical Priest of the Eccliesiarchy. The Sermons of Gorgos strongly indicate that he has had access to pure and holy genetic knowledge related to the Adeptus Astartes.

Frater Gorgos, a man of many names.
(No-one could remember ihs actual name.)

Information of this nature should never have left the Imperial Palace, let alone Holy Terra. How Gorgos encountered it is a matter of supposition, but it seems undeniable that he has it now, and, deluded by his crazed heretical pseudo-faith, he intends to somehow make use of it.

Beyond the Rift, it might be entirely possible that he could do so, producing who-knows-what horrors.

Though the journey will be insanely difficult, the matter is vital enough for the Inquisition to dispatch Inquisitor Maximus Delbrück, Arch-Sequencior of the Ordo Biologus, to find Gorgos, recover whatever sacred genetic knowledge he has and to make sure no-one else make heretical use of it.

However, Radical factions within the Ordo Biologus have quite different ideas about the possible uses of the Fraters Genetic scripture. Inquisitor Du Miir, Statisticodicier of the Ordo Biologus, and an ally of Navigator House Shen, also secretly sets forth to recover Gorgos and his knowledge.

Unbeknownst to both groups, the twisted Gene Cult of the Imprisoned Moon, following either strange rumour trickling through the Imperiums underbelly, or fragments of alleged future-knowledge, decide they must find and stop Gorgos themselves.

Each group wants the Fat Priest, and his secrets, for themselves.


(Meta - So, Brendan S was refereeing and the initial gaming board was populated with the stuff Evan had stayed up the previous night preparing. The only person who had played Inquisitor before was me and that was once, with someone else performing the Ref function.

All our games were essentially learning games. Inquisitor is... granular. When I told people we should only have three models each in a three-person game, I'm not sure anyone believed me.

We started at about noon, ran two games with about six turns for the first game and four or five for the second.  We finished, I think about eight or nine pm, I would estimate it took us about half an hour a turn. A range of books, rules and cheat sheets were open all over the room and were passed back and forth between players and Brendan continually. We were absolutely missing many of the rules and gradually layered in more and more as we carried on, often via the "how does this work? Look it up" method.

Most of the rules to Inquisitor do actually work, and work pretty well. It's simply that there are so many  of them, and they all interrelate.)

It was noon at the margins of the Spen-5 spaceport..

Mega-Chickens, perhaps the product of Gogos's genetic craft, wait somnulent.
 (Evan had a lot of weird and really well painted and converted minis and we ended up adding them to the board to see what happened. Brendan ended up running them and deciding how they would interact if messed with.)

Frater Gorgos awaits, accompanied by guards;

(Ram had a bunch of extra minis, I think Brendan ran the Frater, the Golioths and the Canoness straight using the example stats given in the Inquisitor rulebook for different archetypes.)

Like every (both) game of Inquisitor I've played in before, things began with each group slowly creeping forwards towards their assumed goal, initially unaware of the exact presence or location of either of the other two, trying not to make their own presence obvious.

Evans bois came in from the north, Rams from the south west and mine from the south east.

Note that big turret, which will become relevant  in later turns.

None of us really had any grasp on the Awareness or stealth rules at this point. 
If we had, perhaps things might have gone differently. (Probably not though).

Rams Ordo Biologis entering from the south west.

Turns out that Gorgos was actually meeting with some of Evans artfully-converted mutants for some creepy exchange of genetic Info. I don't have many pictures of those dudes but Evan has one here.

This is from a little later in the game. The head-guy is called Breugal.

Anyway, if my playstyle is about anything, its about poor impulse control and fucking about with wierd animals. On noticing the sleeping Ultra-Chickens in a nearby cargo container, Apothecary Krax decides to fuck with them 'as a distraction'.

This goes immediately and horribly wrong and the chickens charge directly forwards into the Chapter Master..

But don't manage to damage him....

And now Gorgos, and everyone else on the board, know we are here.

This sets the tone for my corner of the board, embarrassing failure and an whacky-races atmosphere. But don't worry, everyone else is still at least trying to play the game 'properly'.

Rams Ordo Biologus also advance carefully. A bit too carefully as his assasin Kiera Knifely ends up separated from the rest and gets into a relentless duel with Gorgos's enforcer/cannoness bodyguard..

Delbrüc advances with discretion while his assassin and the Fraters bodyguards trade shots, thrown knives and blows.

Kieras duel with the Enforcer takes up most of the rest of the game. 

Our girl only gets knocked down initially, after that she gets back up and kicks some ass, gradually whittling down the enforcers sword with her power blades (we didn't know that power weapons almost always just annihilate 'normal weapons)

Meanwhile, Evans House Shen are playing like grownups..

While the Priests bodyguards are occupied with the Moon Cult and Inquisition, they sneak up behind his unguarded rear..

And in a flurry of blows, smack him right in the head! (and groin, both specific locations with specific damage charts)

Gorgos is down! His bodyguards are on the back foot. All Shen need to do now is drag his ass out of there.

Not only that, but in investigating a strange lifeform hidden beneath a tarp (provided by K Yani)

Inquisitor Du Miir firstly traps it by ordering his gunthrall to apply the effects of its graviton gun to the tarp. And then uses his scanner to discover that this creature registers as an Astartes...!

Meanwhile, the Moon Cult are trying to deal with one of Gogos's bodyguards..

They are not doing that badly, but unfortunately Breugal, the criminal mutant, has some kind of signalling thing which he tosses into the melee between the bodyguard and Moon Cult.

Causing this stations defence cannon to rotate and focus on the growing melee.

Apothecary Krax works out something is up and tries to grab the signaller to throw it away.

But Inquisitors quite elegant initiative rules mean he fucks that up, and the lascannon fires on the signaller, apparently scything through the legs of all three in combat.

Delbrüc gets tired watching his acolyte fail to take out this bodyguard and decides to unleash an goddamn PSYCHIC FIRESTORM.

However, its way too late for the Biologus and Moon Cult. While everyone else has been dicking about, Inquisitor Du Miir has both negotiated with, and now released the creature from beneath the tarp, this mutated astartes of some kind, is a motherfucking psychic giant.

Its turn six, Evan has the Priest and the psychic giant. No-one else is even close and Brendan has to go, its mutually decided that House Shen have won this game.

Inquisitor Du Miir, House Shen, Frater Gorgos and the psychic giant retreat, leaving the Moon Cultists and Ordo Biologis in the dust.

What are Gorgos,  House Shen and Inquisitor Du Miir planning? And will the Cult of the Imprisoned Moon and  Inquisitor Delbrüc be able to do anything about it? Wait to find out in...

Game Two
Rise of the Meta-Coral

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