Friday 24 August 2018

Back to 2015 Motherfuckers!

When things were good a pure and people did lists of useful things.



So now there's 100? 

Except I'm pretty sure I repeated a few. Plus I stopped caring about whatever the rules were pretty (immediately) quickly. And many of these aren't really 'traps'.


1. Bird Trap - Room of  big stuffed birds. One has switch to secret door in its beak. The rest are not stuffed, but violent resentful waiting undead.

2. Hourglass Trap - Key blocks the sand, door opens inwards.

3. Infinite Distance Trap - Only 20 feet but end of passage is always double the distance you have already gone.

4. Earthquake Trap - Portal guarded by Earth God. Opening splits building or dungeon apart with giant chasm. Whole other half of place now other side of infinite sheer sided hole. Chasm may expand to entire nation. Add written warning to increase gamability.

5. Fated Doppelgangers - Dark room full of tactical cover. Familiar voices warn you not to approach, turn back. Guards are your own cursed older selves, wounded from adventure. At end of dungeon you must become them and re-fight the fight, hoping to win this time and (presumably) kill alternate younger selves? Or fake your way out of the paradox somehow.

6. Trouble Giant - Room full of big squashy giant asleep and having a nightmare. If made happy will shrink down so room can be navigated but has been told not to let anyone through or there will be trouble and he grows bigger when scared. He doesn't want Trouble.

7. Song Trap - Key to something is a song. Giant sleeping Supermonster chained nearby.

8. Door rotting but barred with the bones of a saint. Damaging them a serious sin.

9. Door is Gingerbread but transforms those who pass into Fondant Men. Hungry Monsters beyond.

10. Big tall complex place. Dimensional exit door carried about by swarms of climbing skeletons with added spider bone limbs. They fear all life and climb up and away from anything living.

11. Vantablack Cathedral with blind black-robed archers in the belfries. They shoot anything they hear with importune skill. (The Samurai Jack.)

12. First through door sent 100 years back into the past. Few monsters or treasure and traps & problems being built, they can find ways to leave signs and info for their friends in the future to help them past stuff.

13. Floor paved with ripe babies and spikes.

14. Door is the shadow of a billowing flag, but there are many flags, no light, no wind and they are all highly flammable.

15. Door is under a rug but the whole floor is rugs and a nice old man says the one rule is that you can't move the rugs - he breaks down and goes mad if you do. (i.e. the 'DFD'). Possibly add infinite depth of rugs for interest.

16. Can only be opened with the finger bone of a very recent and entirely willing suicide.

17. Cyclopean Door. - 1 mile high. Latch, handle & key hole half way up sheer dense wood. key in lock but is the size of a house. Gogmagogic sign reads 'Door Opens Quick'. Howling gale from under crack prevents floor level access. Door swings open in a 1/4 mile arc destroying everything. (Possible local settlement & 'Cathedral of the Door'.)

18. Door is glass terrarium full of poisoned ants. They run out and over the handle and about the room. 1 sting painful - many debilitating. Lock keps active by the living ants, if they die, portal permanently shut.

19. Door/Area utterly evil and cursed. Evil kept at bay by 20 sacred statues of Devas/Saints - they have jewel eyes that help them see the evil with. Half of the jewels are missing. PC's can replace them to make area passable, or steal the rest. Other Adventure Party is here and disagrees with whatever the PC's want.

20. Door simply massive boulder, guarded by Giant strong enough to lift or roll it but cursed so that for all who pass that live, he loses one year of life, and for all of the dead who are denied, he also loses a year. The Giant is blind. (i.e. the 'Oddessy'.)

21. Lots of treasure but its invisible and hidden 'between life and death'. Guarded by a Wyvern who drips their poison into a crystal cup every day. Allows those who drink free access, but they always die. (i.e. 'the Potter'.)

22. Climb up giants chimney to get thing. Goblin tends fire at the bottom that fills it with wondrously noxious and choking soot and gas, but keeps it free of Stirges who swoop through whenever fire is out.

23. Key to thing is the golden spear of a noble hero. Hero and spear are the only thing suppressing sea of shadows from slowly consuming building or dungeon from the outside in.

24. Key can only be carried by foot as a slow, even pace. Any alternate or faster movement and it teleports back to the other end of the Dungeon. There are fast monsters. (Or, dangerous but slow monsters, easy to avoid, if you don't have the key.)

25. Door very small. magic fountain shrinks you. Area between fountain and door has foxes, mink and hawks.

26. Love Lock - Door/chest has 'spin the bottle' combination lock, clearly labelled as so. Two present randomly fall in love. Specific actions, gifts, dates, anniversaries, are required and heavy penalties if not met.

27. Treasure is a Witches Shoes. Super valuable but can't be moved without being worn and will always lead anyone who isn't the Witch 'towards danger'.

28. Only those wearing the crown of a King may pass. All others will be transformed into Tapiers. All local kings hate each other, want the treasure behind the portal, don't want the other kings to have it, and have large collections of Tapiers.

29. Rain Gods Treasure - If touched, doors lock and treasure turns to cold wind and rain that gradually fills room and drowns everything. 'Key' to get in and out is a single candleflame.

30. Creepy Wizard made the door. Someone has to fuck the lock to get in. (or handle - REPRESENTATION). (The 'Raggi'.)

31. Treasure room a mess of gold and blood. Main prize is a hurricane gem that activates if touched or if its 'friends' (the other treasures) are taken from it.

32. Dungon has toughish monsters at the start, but they get easier, but they all avoid you mostly. Treasure is poisoned and touching it level drains and nerfs you slowly. Sunlight cures this but now the cowardly goblins at the start are gonna be a major problem, and you just brought them the treasure.

33. Access via Magic God Scales. Needs only 30 hearts from freshly (ie right now) sacrificed honey badgers to activate. (i.e. The 'Anubis'.)

34. Path is broken tube through Demon Space - can only be held open by occupying life-devouring superchair. (i.e. the 'Warhammer'.)

35. Code to pass tattooed on a Succubus.

36. World of teeth? Teeth that make a snake and pull other teeth? Ok I'm waaaay out of ideas.

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